I think deep, in the crevices where most people are afraid to go. I break the conventions of what you're "supposed to" talk about. Someone once told me that there are two kinds of songs -- love songs and pirate songs. I listen to the pirate songs.
I am creative. I am authentic. I am emotional and awkward. I am healing. I am a writer. I am an artist. I am Beth, and I am (not) a problem.
I believe in trusting the process, without needing to plan it all out. I believe in women, reclaiming their true selves. I believe in hope. I believe in leaning into the wilderness. I believe in rainbows.
I believe in showing up, even imperfectly. Especially imperfectly.
I love my husband, my children, and the soul-seekers of the world. I don't have it all together. I am learning how not to apologize. I am learning, instead, to roar.
I have a BA in creative writing and a Master's in elementary education. I'm the founder of Made and the author of Life After Eating Disorder. I was selected as one of BlogHer's Voices of the Year for 2014.
I created my painting in a high school art history class -- a still life of apples. It was fun! I didn't touch art again for many years, but the seed was planted. And it has grown into my very own art shop.
I didn't know stillbirth still happened in the western world until it happened to me. Thirty-one weeks of pregnancy and all the evidence I had for Eve's life was a few precious items and the yawning ache in my soul that still throbs, two and more years later.
We returned home from the hospital, empty-armed, I was brokenhearted but determined. To grieve well. To feel, all of it. To let God use it. And I did, and he did, I guess. I don't know, really, who did what, only that I showed up to the pain, to the searing of reality. And it changed me -- it still changes me.
I know pain and I am still standing.
You can read my stories at the Secret Rebel Club, in Sprout Magazine, and in Still Standing Magazine. You can buy my original art and prints at EpiphanyArt Studio. I'm working on a few delicious projects that will debut later this year. Do stay tuned.
For now, please, make yourself at home. You don't have to pretend here. If you're having a hard day, you are welcome to just soak in my words and be wherever you are. Go wherever you need to go.
Here are a few of my favorite posts to get you started:
- What I Mean When I Say, "My Daughter Was Stillborn"
- On Not-Praying
- Unbelieving Easter: When Good Friday Comes Alive
- When I am Grateful for My Husband's Atheism
- Owning My Awesome: 4 Key Tools For Writing a Novel in a Month
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I love letters. And you are welcome to email me to share any thoughts or questions you have. And, if my art or my words have impacted you, I am beyond grateful, and would love to hear how.
Thanks for stopping by. You are most welcome here.